Measure how long your child can work before the first negative reaction flashes across her face.

Count the minutes. Use timers. A Count-Up timer is good for this.

And then observe; can this child work for 2 minutes, 3 minutes, 4 minutes?

Children with autism are very sensitive to the duration of time, but you rarely hear people talk about this.

A child with autism may be able to work just fine for 3 minutes. Push her to four minutes and a tantrum erupts! The negative and stress reactions can escalate in a flash. One second everything seems fine, the next minute you have a meltdown.

Find the sweet spot where the task is right, the tag point is right, and the time is right for the child.

Respect the child’s capacity. Set the tasks and the work schedule based on the number of minutes she can participate successfully and happily. Give her the security that she won’t be asked to do too much for too long.

Use timers. Set it for 2 minutes, or whatever the time is, and stop when it goes off. Let the child take a break. Tag and reinforce her for productive actions during the break, the things we’ve talked about before (Eyes on Toy, Eyes on Book, Touches Block, Picks Up Doll, Eyes on Teacher).

This is not easy because we want to push that child. Initially, it will take time before she comes back to the table for structured activities. But eventually she will work for longer time periods.

Build a positive, trusting relationship. She should feel supported, and that she is not pushed beyond her capacity. When she can work at the pace that is right for her, you will have a tantrum-free experience!